What Is It Like To Be An Outler (Genius)?

First of all, a review of how we here at The Capable Genius define like terms.  This is not particularly scientific but rather gleaned from our observations and, frankly, our opinions.

Talent--an exceptional ability (for example, the ability to run fast, to play the piano excellently, write poetry with technical skill and beauty, etc).  One does not have to be a genius to be talented.  They SHOW genius, but it is within the band of their talent.

Bright--extra intellectual ability (straight A's, good student, may be in gifted programs due to teacher recommendation but IQ tests would show "bright" not "gifted")

Genius--exceptional intellectual ability.  They may or may not be good students, but their ability to think is profound.  Their entire nervous system is more attune to stimuli than the norm.  This contributes to "overexcitabilities".  It also accounts for the ability to synthesize information and create new from it.

Outliers--aka genius, "gifted".  We find this term the most accurate description of high IQ people as it a)reflects a position on a bell curve, is not loaded sentiment of  inherent worth or favor (as the term "gifted" tends to be) b)encompasses the entirety of the nervous system experiences and activity instead of merely focusing on intellect (which "genius" tends to do).  We do, though, use "genius" and "Outlier" interchangeably on The Capable Genius.


So what is it like to be an Outlier?  How does the experience differ from the norm?  It depends on the Outlier.  Each experience is incredibly different depending on the parts of the brain that are more active.  This is part of the struggle of being an Outlier--not only are you different from the norm, but you are also different from other Outliers.  However, like athletes of different sports, Outliers can find some common ground:

-Intensity.  This is probably the hallmark of the genius.  Whatever sense or experience stimulates the brain, stimulates it to a greater degree in the Outlier.  This can cause problems with overexcitabilities (essentially the incredibly intense excitation of the neurons) in which the genius seems to either overreact, shun, or crave more whatever stimulus has excited the brain.

-Atypical sensations, emotions, understandings.  Imagine being the only person who can see in a world filled with the blind.  On one hand, it is incredibly beautiful to see sunsets and machines.  On the other hand, trying to explain what you see is nigh unto impossible. It can be isolating, but also provides the food that our brains need to make new discoveries and connections.

-A rich, valid inner world.  The world inside the head of a genius is just as vast as the world outside.  Imagine being able to go anywhere in the universe with a thought.  What would you see, experience, explore?  Now imagine being able to have a fully functional “universe” between your ears.  Libraries and laboratories and songs and poems and inventions all dancing around the inside of your head.  This is most likely where the “absent-minded professor” meme comes from.  The truth is that that professor is not absent minded, he is absent bodied—he is living quite well in his inner universe, but the problems might arise in his outer universe with the people and situations who require his attention.

I would like to offer this:  while it might be tempting to call the outer universe the “real world”, it is no more or less real than the inner world of the genius mind.  The songs that we sing in the outer world started in an inner world.  The paintings, medicine, cars, gardens, books, all started in the rich inner world of a mind.  The difference between the inner universe and the outer universe is pretty much one of location.

*This brings up an extremely important note that plays into existential depression and other experiences of the genius:  great angst can arise in the genius when sliding between the inner and outer universe.  What seems perfectly reasonable in terms of “what should” happen (for example, if the genius has a strict moral code that sees what people should do to be happy or to help others), is often not observed in the outer world.  A genius child knows that people should be nice to animals.  In his inner universe, that is an accepted fact, like gravity.  However, in the outer universe, many people abuse animals on purpose, and it is much like suddenly having gravity reverse or being thrust from one country to another where the mores and traditions and experiences have all changed.  

As one might imagine, this can cause incredible frustration, turmoil, and anxiety.  To know what people can do to reduce suffering, to know how the world should be, and to see people choosing intentionally not to live how the world should be, can be extraordinarily draining.  We will cover this more when we address existential depression, but we wanted to bring this to your attention now as a further explanation of how the conflict between two real worlds can cause troubles.

Now, the inner universe has fewer constraints than the outer universe does.  Gravity, time, uninvented words, new images and colors, all can be played with and explored.  However, the imagination, the second part of genius, can go awry into maladaptive thoughts, feelings, and experiences.  Anxiety, typical depression, mischief, superiority complexes, all can be fully developed in an inner universe that is just as rich and real as the outer one.  

Think about the movie the Matrix.  While the body was reclined in a chair, the mind was so thoroughly immersed in the inner world of the computer, that if the person “died” in the Matrix, the body, which was far removed from any danger, died as well.  The mind was powerful enough to create a new reality for the person.

When this involves creations of books, art, science, etc, then this is a wonderful bonus not just to the genius, but to those who will reap the benefit of the creations of his inner world.  

However, when the emotions are uncontrolled, like an unmanned fire hose, they will pull the genius into whatever sort of madness the emotional state (which stirs the imagination, feeding off of its "what if") is indulging in.  This is when neuroses begin to show—again the inner universe of the genius often spills out into the outer universe.  Obsessive compulsive disorder, panic disorder, mood dysregulation, chicanery, etc will fill up the inner, and the outer, world of the genius.

-Fluidity, complexity, and speed of thought.  Because an Outlier brain goes so fast, it can seem a little random or unhinged to those listening.  The Outlier might tend to finish other people's sandwiches sentences because the conversation is being played more quickly in the mind of the Outlier.  Situations often have layers or depths that the Outlier sees which the neurotypical does not--things begin to take on symbolic or multiple meanings and/or the Outlier can see further down the road.  For example, the Outlier might be able to perceive that action "a" which leads to result "b" will eventually lead to consequence "m".

-Asynchrony.  The young Outlier probably developed oddly, for example, having the ability to follow and contribute to a conversation about physics, but throwing a tantrum when the crust was not cut off the bread.  While asychrony eventually evens out for the most part, it can be a very...interesting, and often bewildering, experience to raise a Capable Genius.

-Polymath Abilities. The Outlier almost always has more than one extremely high capability, for example, the ability to dance and be an engineer.  Think of DaVinci, who was a scientist as well as an artist and inventor.  If there is only one high ability, that might be considered talent more than genius. 

-Difficulty relating.  This depends on how far the Outlier is from the apex of the bell curve.  There is a sweet spot, an "Optimal Intelligence" in which the brain is just more adept enough to allow the Outlier to shine among people while also being able to relate to the neurotypical and be relatable to them.  Once you are past this, though, even speech patterns can seem odd to the neurotypical.  We often can get an inkling (though it is not perfect) of the intellectual ability of someone by the way they move and speak or the facial expressions they use.

-Existential Angst.  It can be overwhelming for an Outlier to know they can do much but have no idea what to do.  Add in emotional overexcitabilities which urge the Outlier to "go fix the world!", the fact that one might have the ability to be an excellent doctor and an excellent lawyer, but not both at the same time ("Which one of my natural abilities do I ignore?  Is that the right decision?  What if I was really meant to be a doctor but I chose lawyer?"), and the fact that very few people understand what it is like to be you and therefore cannot adequately give counsel, and there often occurs bouts of existential angst or depression (not to be confused with "regular" depression....this is more of a demoralization as opposed to "I have no idea why I am depressed").

-Metacognition.  "Thinking about Thinking".  A semi-constant systems check of how we are thinking, what we are thinking about, if our thinking is sound, what might distract us from our thinking (which can be ironic as the mere thinking about distractions can be a huge distraction).  Metacognition is one of the most useful skill of an Outlier.


These are just a few traits to consider, there are many more.  Notice we did not include "early reading" (as that is not actually proven to mean anything at all), nor voracious reader (lots of people like to read lots of books), and other sort of "identifiers".  Those are more.....effects than causes.  Early reading can happen because a child is an Outlier, or can occur in a bright child with an attentive parent, or may be due a talent for language vs having a high IQ.  We know of one Capable Genius who learned how to turn off her mobile at 10 weeks, but did not read until she was 8.

We also would like to point out that none of these by themselves are "differentials".  A person may have trouble relating because they are an Outlier OR because they are just a narcissist.  A person might be experiencing existential angst because they just turned 45 (existential angst in Outliers often starts much earlier...sometimes even in 4 year olds).  If you suspect you or someone else is an Outlier, a full evaluation (not just an IQ test) given by a psychologist who specializes in "gifted" people is a must.  Let us emphasize:  it must be a FULL evaluation, not just an IQ test and it must be with a specialist, not just any psychologist, just like if you had a torn ACL, you want to go to a sports medicine doc, not just a family practitioner.  Yes, both can run the same tests, but the sports med guy knows a lot more than the fam prac.

This should give you a glimpse into the mind of the Outlier.  Feel free to suggest points we might have missed, this is hardly an exhaustive list.

Everyone is a Gift but Not Everyone Is Gifted

Soon we will be leaving the term gifted in the garbage bin where it belongs.  However, before we do that, we have to tidy up some paperwork, if you will, regarding the oft heard arguments and discussions regarding highly abled people, including our favorite:  "Everyone is a Gift".

Yes.  There is no arguing that.  Everyone is a gift.  Everyone was created by God and has human worth.  The most incredible athlete in existence is not worth a brass farthing more than a crippled elderly person or a sick child or a "regular Joe".

Everyone is a gift.

However, NOT everyone is gifted.  Not everyone is highly able.  Not everyone needs to be. 

This takes thinking outside of the normal, societal "More=better" paradigm, so stick with me here...

We each, every one of us, have a specific purpose in life.  We have a specific role we are supposed to play in the Lord's universe.  Every person was given their own measure and number of abilities (and, consequently has their own weaknesses as well) that they would need to fulfill their own specific role.

Take Bob and Joe.  They both sing.

Bob has the voice of warm wood and honey--smooth, strong, rich.  On a measuring scale of singing, he has a 10 out of 10.  He also is a bit of a ham, a performer, and is incredibly gregarious--audiences love him and leave his concerts bubbling with laughter and energy.  He was raised in an urban area, born into a musical family, so his path was natural and right for his talents and abilities.  He quickly rises to the top of his music genre and his performances sell out. 

Joe has a nice, steady, pleasant voice.  He is always on key but perhaps does not have that extra kick of "something" that Bob has in his voice.  However, Joe also plays the guitar.  Joe is an introvert, an artistic guy.  His quiet demeanor is calming to those around him.  He was raised in a smaller town and is self taught, which brings that "down home", organic feel to his music. His life is not flashy, he works as a radiology tech at the local clinic, but that gives him much time to write original music.  He takes his voice, his music, his guitar, and his quiet disposition to retirement homes and hospital wards and soothes and delights the sick and the weary.  He is not high energy, which is perfect for his weaker audiences.  He will never make a million dollars singing for sick kids, but that is ok.  He will not die in obscurity because the Lord sees his work, just as the Lord does not look at Bob's bank account (which is admittedly hefty) but rather looks at Bob's heart and intent and what Bob has done with his fame and money.  Both men can do excellent work in the Lord or blow it completely--their choice.

Two men, both singers, but each was given a specific set of talents, circumstances, opportunities to glorify the Lord in specific ways--one with a loud, booming voice that reaches and energises millions, one with a much smaller, but much deeper role--giving comfort and being approachable and accessible.  He has the time to talk one on one with all of his fans, telling his story of redemption.  Bob cannot access all his fans, but his story is published in music magazines and that is how he spreads his story of redemption.

The key is not to try to have "the most" of one talent, but rather use to the fullest all the talents and abilities given.  It is still all about glorifying the Lord and doing the tasks that He set for us to do before the creation of the world.

Now, what this means is that not everyone is gifted.  Those who do not have a genius IQ do not need a genius IQ for the tasks the Lord has given them.  They are not "less than".

Those of us who do have a genius IQ, or are particularly highly abled, need their abilities for the tasks the Lord has for them.  The man who was given five talents to earn five more talents was not any more highly praised than the man who was given two talents to earn two more talents.  They both were given exactly what they needed to do with exactly what the Lord wanted them to do and were praised the exact same way as "good and faithful servants". (Matthew 25:14-30)

The abilities and lacks that I have are perfect for the role I am to play in the universe.  I can't sing, for example.  I am probably a 4 out of 10 on the singing scale--enough to warble in church without hurting anyone's ears (usually) but that's about it.  That is not a problem because I was never meant to be a singer. I wish I could sing.  I love to sing.But that is not the role the Lord has for me. 


Everyone is a gift, but not everyone is an Outlier.

Those with genius IQ's or who are highly talented do have specific needs and requirements to reach their full potential.  We, as a society, would not deny an opera singer training.  We would not deny a carpenter wood.  We would not deny a child with weak limbs braces for them.  We would not deny an Olympic-level gymnast a coach and floormats. The Outlier child needs specific tools to work to capacity.

So when we hear "Everyone is gifted" we say no.  Not to be jerks, but because the fact is that not everyone has the same needs for the roles that they are to play in their lives.  It dilutes the purpose and joy for every person to insist that they are all highly intelligent or incredible singers or wickedly fast sprinters.  The kid who is not an Outlier will soon be wearied if his parents push him into "gifted" programs, especially since the child was meant by God to, say, be an artist or a competitive swimmer or tinker in the garage as an an inventor. 

Bob's dad might have wanted him to pitch for the Yankees, but that was not where his talent was.  Joe's friends might have wanted him to audition for the lead in a musical, but that is not where his personality was.  We each must look at our basket of talents and abilities, shortcomings and weaknesses**, and the opportunities around us to do the most good with what we have, praying to the Lord that we see the opportunities He has for us then diving into them with excellence to the best of our abilities and being content with that.

**Not to bog down in the weeds, but this does not mean that we do not try new things or step out into nerve wracking situations.  Joe would have had to get the gumption up to play in public as an introvert and might feel weary after.  Bob might have to remember the spotlight is not always on him and need to let other people have their moments.  I discovered in my 30's that I have an uncanny ability in archery and spent the next few years teaching, competing, and working in an archery range.  So we must not stagnate, and I still want to take singing lessons, but the point is that we need to do what we can with everything we have for the glory of God.

Outlier, Not Gifted

There is perhaps no larger stumbling block to the highly intelligent/highly talented community than the term "gifted".  It is the bane of our existence.  It creates an instant defence in those who were never selected for Gifted and Talented classes.  It makes it impossible for us to describe who we are without sounding like self absorbed jerks.  It makes it impossible for mothers who have children with high IQ's to reach out to other mothers without causing instant jealousy.

It also can cause the person who is gifted to consider themselves superior or that they have no need to work or put forth effort.  It can create an identity of entitlement or can isolate a child so completely that their youth is spent hiding who they are whilst they fight off bullies.

It prevents the highly abled from getting the assistance they need.  It is very easy to generate sympathy from other parents for the child who is not a 'rival' their own, due to disease or injury.  Only the most callous man does not have some place in his heart for a child who struggles to read or walk.

However, try getting education funding for "gifted kids" and suddenly it is as if you are trying to take away Little Timmy's last crutch.  "Why do 'gifted kids' need educational support if they are so 'gifted'?" people ask with a tinge of jealousy. 

Teachers too can feel anger or hostility toward the "gifted troublemaker" kid who outscores their own child.

When parents are overwhelmed by their 3 year old who has given up sleep for Lent and is trying to build his own nuclear reactor in the basement, they too can feel resentment at the "gifted" label "If this is a gift, can I give it back?" is a refrain spoken by more than one frazzled parent or lonely teen.

Most of this could be eliminated by the simple act of changing the term from the emotionally charged "gifted" to the more accurate "outlier".  Outlier is accurate.  It is a place on a bell curve.  It makes no judgement about whether that place is good or bad, it just states a location on a map, so to speak.

It also illustrates poignantly the feelings of isolation that a highly intelligent person can feel.  "I look at the chart of myself and my peers and there are no dots around me" an Outlier might observe.

Words have weight and meaning and subtext that creates ripples of effect throughout entire lives, so here we use the term Outlier and encourage you to do so as well, as you see fit. 

The Whole Outlier

You are not a brain in a jar.

You are not just what you do well.

You are not a single note, a fancy trick, a freak show.

You are a human with a body, mind, heart, and spirit.

You may have relied on your strengths to get you through life so far:  not having to study, being able to excel in sports or art or music, relying on that one (or more) shining talent or ability to establish your worth and your place in the world to the detriment of the rest of you.

It is time to change that.

It is time to strengthen your weaknesses.

It is time to hone your strengths.

It is time to strengthen your hands for work, your heart for relationships, your spirit for faith, and your feet for willingness to move.

It is time to become the full measure of the person you were meant to be.

We get you.  We know the challenges of being the smartest person in the room or the only one who can hear the complexities of the music or wondering if you are really that smart or really that dumb.

We get your overexcitabilities, your frustrations.

We are not afraid or jealous of your successes, your achievements.

You are welcome to chill out and be yourself here.

You looked for a place to belong.  You just found it.

Being Capable, Blog Post 1

You know what it's like to be a genius, but do you know how to be capable?  Many of us don't. Due to our exquisitely tuned minds, we might find ourselves struggling with perceptions and experiences that others can't begin to comprehend.  We keep our eyes out for that one person who might possibly understand even a portion of what we feel.  We seek someone who enjoys thinking for its own sake.  We want a buddy who knows the pure rush, the high, we get when we work a math problem or solve a conundrum. We want to talk to someone who knows that our brains will eat themselves if we don't give them something to chew on.

While so many people seem to love the simple, we crave the complex—in fact, for some of us the simple is actually beyond our comprehension—like trying to analyse the exact muscle fibers we use while walking.

We sometimes feel great superiority above the crowd of “normals”, yet sometimes we long to be with them, wishing we could move in social circles as easily as others.  We either decide to eschew society in a fit of superior resentment, stewing in our own haughtiness and pain for the rest of our lives, or we consistently put ourselves out there, raw and bleeding, and feel each rejection as a personal reflection on us.

We have so many answers.  We often know the best ways to make stuff happen, to solve problems, but find it increasingly difficult to get our ideas accepted.  It is actually awesome for us, sometimes, when people say “Honestly, I have no idea what you are talking about.” with a deeply apologetic smile, and we bristle when people ignore or scoff at our thoughts.

We have so many questions that people cannot answer for us or that we don't want to ask.  It would be nice to have someone say “Here, this is what you are feeling and why.  This is how you solve this problem.  This is your purpose in life.  This is your great gift, and this is not your strong suit.  This is how to find peace in your mind and in your circumstances.”.  Our difficulty lies, though, in the fact that we have questions about ourselves that we think (often rightly) that no one can begin to comprehend.  A marathon runner can't go to a 5^th grader at recess and say “Hey, I find that on mile 14, I start to hit the wall.  What is the best way for me to manage that break in focus?” or “How can I manage both a stress fracture and plantar fasciitis in the same foot?”.  It is not that the 5^th grader is not a fine young runner, but he just has not experienced the same amount of running as the marathoner has.

Yet sometimes that 5^th grader in our lives knows the exact right answer to help us, but we are too proud or too superior to follow his advice.   We forget that there is a difference between intelligence and wisdom.  Intelligence is an innate quality—barring any accidents, illnesses, or other problems, a person will stay at approximately the same intellectual stratum that they were born with.  However, wisdom is open to all, regardless of the Weschler score.

That 5^th grader might know exactly how to break through a mental block, or might sagely say “You have to let the bone heal.  It’s ok to stop running for a little while.”.  However, we might scoff at such advice from someone who isn't in the same league as we are, then find that that stress fracture becomes a permanent source of pain and we can never quite overcome that emotional wall that keeps us from developing past mile 14.

This blog is here to guide you through many of the pitfalls that we Outliers encounter.  We will learn the difference between intelligence and wisdom, assertion and arrogance, friendliness and fawning, introspection and “navel staring”, introversion and resentment.  We will learn how to manage our emotional, intellectual, physical, and spiritual lives to become the most we were made to be.

 

Note:  We use the term genius because that is what we are.  It is not a term of worth or value as a human, it is a descriptor of innate cognitive ability.  A fast runner is a fast runner, even if he also is a bank robber or beats his wife.   Therefore there is no need to blush and hide from accepting the fact that we have been given, through no action or striving on our part, a fast mind.